"I wanna' love like Johnny and June..."

I'm in complete love with that song.

Anyways, I don't quite know what to say. My feelings right now are so confusing, I guarantee you'd rather just not read this blog at all- but, here goes nothing...


So much has happened since I wrote last, I can't even begin to think of a place to start. So, for once, I'm just going to allow myself to ramble and see what comes out first, and what finally comes out last.

Today, I tried out for a band called "Enoch". The leader of the group, Zack, goes to my church, along with his brother, Josh. They want me to lead sing, if I make it. They're going to "vote me in" after a few more practices/trials with them. They said my voice was "really pretty" and "unique" and "lead vocals-type". But don't get me wrong- I know there's plenty of stuff for me to work on, still. I'm no masterpiece. I really hope I make it, I would love that experience. They're a Christian Rock band, and they're really good. I've always felt the calling to be in music ministry, and I feel that this is the perfect opportunity.

Honestly, I wish boys were not a part of my life- right now, at least. I need to focus on God and His plan for my life, whether or not that includes any such boy. I'm starting to crush really hard on this guy though, and for some reason... it just feels right, finally. But in the past, everytime I've really liked someone, they've never liked me too. Who's to say this time will be any different?

I think I need to go play the piano, or watch some tv. Something to get my mind off of him, and this, and that, and....


I'll write later.

XOXO, Emily Love


"I wanna' be there on the stage with you, you and I could be the next rage too. Hear the crowd roar, make 'em want more, kick the footlights out. I wanna' love like Johnny and June, rings of fire burning with you. I wanna' walk the line, walk the line, until the end of time. I wanna' love, love you that much. Cash it on in, give it all up. And when you're gone, I wanna' go too, like Johnny and June..."

"The Hills" Recap

I have to hurry on this, because it's almost time for Ariel to be here; she's picking me up to go to church. I still have to eat and "freshen up" and it's already 4:57 P.M.

Anyways, "The Hills"- I LOVED IT!
But, duh, I pretty much always do.
Shall we recap? I think we shall.

Lauren and Audrina- AWWW! They're back to being good friends, and they're little hug session was really sweet. I'm glad that they both settled their differences, because they had a pretty tight bond.


Spencer and Heidi- Good gosh almighty, I DO NOT like Spencer. AT ALL. Period, the end. He's a ruthless jerk, and Heidi is apparently too stupid to see it, or she's too scared to let him go. Either way, she needs Lauren back, because Lauren was her only true best friend. NEVER DITCH YOUR GIRLFRIENDS FOR ONE BOYFRIEND.

Spencer and Holly- Once again, Spencer is disrespectful to yet another person, who may I point he has no right whatsoever to be rude to. Holly is an incredible influence in Heidi's life, and quite frankly- she knows what's good for her sister, and that's NOT Spencer.

Holly and Lauren- Friends again? I think yes! I'm not too sure whether or not this is going to help Lauren and Heidi's relationship finally mend, but I think it'd be pretty cool if it did.

Holly and Heidi- Heidi is pushing away everyone except for Spencer, and then when she gets mad at him tries to flee and realizes she has no one. HEIDI, YOUR SISTER IS TRYING TO HELP. I like Heidi, but she does need help to get away from her stupid butthole of a boyfriend.

Lo and Audrina- Seems to me like they might just become friends after all, which, I think, is great.

Audrina and Justin- She's given him so many chances, let's hope this one finally works.

I think I've covered most of it. I'll come back and edit this if I remember things later that I missed.

And let me just say that I LOVE WHITNEY! She's so amazing, beautiful, and she really does stay out of the drama- instead of just saying she's going to. You go Whitney (:

I gotta run!
Write more later?

XOXO, Emily Love

Burnin' up

It's so frickin' hot in here! Someone definitely needs to turn the air on. I would, but my dad gets mad at me when I do. So, I'm not going to.

Today was okay. Fourth period was really fun! Me and Makenzie got to go around and practice taking pictures in whatever class we wanted, with the cool techno camera Mrs. Slaughter bought for Yearbook. It's an amazing camera, and we got to just chill out and see alot of our friends in their classes for a valid reason.

I'm stoked for THE HILLS tonight, baby! What a shocker; I always am, every Monday night.

I drove after school for Driver's Ed with Marlee. At first it was a tad awkward, but that was expected. Then I got comfortable behind the wheel (after running over a curb :D) and he took me out on the "real roads" and I even drove myself home. I was pretty proud of myself. I have to drive again tomorrow.

I MISS ALORA. She needed me today, and I really wanted to run all the way to Georgia and give her a HUGE hug- no matter how entirely breathless I would be. I drew her a picture in first period, Honors Biology.
:D

I just ate steak and green beans for dinner, and it was pretty good. I need to go clean up the kitchen, so I'll write more later.

XOXO, Emily Love

"I just want you to know, that I've been fighting to let you go. Some days I make it through, and then there's nights that never end..."

Fresh Prince @ 6:00

Every morning, at 6:00 A.M., Fresh Prince of Bel-Air comes on and I lay in bed and watch it, until 6:30 or :45 when I get up and get ready.
:D

I can't say much, I have to study a little bit for a Civics test before I walk over to Carol's. (Carol is my neighbor, she takes me to school every morning when I'm at my dad's.)

School ends at 3:05, and then I have to go driving for Driver's Ed, with Marlee and Mr. Shook. So, I should be home around 6:30? I don't know, somewhere around there.

Write more then.

XOXO, Emily Love

"A thousand times I've seen you standing, gravity like lunar landing, make me want to run 'til I find you. Shut the world away from here, drift to you, you're all I hear."

Breakfast for dinner,

that's what we had. It was delicious.


That's all I have to say.
Goodnight.

XOXO, Emily Love

I

want to be near you.
I want to know that everything's going to be okay.
I want to tell you how badly I need you.
I want to tell you I love you.
I want to hug you, to hold you.
I want to show you what we could be.
I want to let you know how much I think of you.
I want you to know how much I care for you.
I want you to be okay.
I want you to be happy.
I want to be happy.
I want to be in your arms.
I want to sing to you.
I want you to sing to me.
I want to talk to you about my problems.
I want to be there for you.
I want you to push me on the swings.
I want you to write a song for me.
I want to show you the songs I've wrote for you.
I want to hold your hand.
I want to run in fields with you, filled with flowers.
I want to take silly pictures with you.
I want to be over this depression that you're causing me.
I want you to show me all the places you've been.
I want you to teach me how to smile.
I want you to take my breath away.
I want you to drive me around for hours, just talking.
I want you to love me.
I want you to love me, for me.
I want you to share with me all the things you've experienced.
I want you to call me just to hear my voice.
I want you to know that I'd do anything for you.
I want to show you what a real highschool football game is like.
I want to cry on your shoulder.
I want to have inside jokes with you and your friends.
I want to look you in the eyes.
I want to run away with you, to a place where no one could make fun of us.
I want to be the one you get up for in the mornings.
I want you to dance with me in the rain.
I want to wear your hoodie.
I want to know that you won't push me to do things I'm not ready for, because I know you wouldn't.




I want so many things.

But I want to stop wanting.

I want to start giving.


Where ever you are, I want you.

The Circle of Life

I just watched this video on Marlee's MySpace, where My Favorite Highway was singing that song "Circle of Life" from The Lion King. It was pretty funny.

Anyways, I've been thinking alot lately. About random things. When I think, it's hard for me to tell a person other than my piano, my guitar, or just no one in particular- like this blog. Considering no one really reads it anyways, it's helpful to me whenever I need to let out what I'm thinking.

Right now, though, I'm going to go and do something and try to, for once, stop thinking and just do whatever. It probably isn't going to happen, but it's worth a shot.

I miss Alora.
I miss Marlee.
I miss Amanda.
I miss Juliann.
and I miss someone else, who's name I won't mention.

I'll write more later.

XOXO, Emily Love


P.S.- I don't know where you are or who you're with, and yes, that kills me. But I love you, so much, and I want you to be happy- I just want you to be the one I'm waiting on, and for me to be the one you're waiting on.

Do You Feel?

THAT MUSIC VIDEO IS AMAZING! "Do You Feel?" by The Rocket Summer, go check it out!!! MATT THIESSEN IS IN IT!!! Yayuh!

I'm waiting on pictures to upload onto my MySpace. DUDE, it is FREEZING in here. I'm going to go get a sweatshirt, be right back.


Okay, I'm back. But I didn't get a sweatshirt. I'm just gonna stick it out until I finally decide to lay down and go to sleep under the covers. I'm punishing myself by freezing myself until I'm forced to go under the covers. Hahaha.

Let's see.... let's review today.

I woke up, and went to school. So exciting, I know.

First period, Honors Biology, we had a test. I know I missed a few, but I think I did at least decent on it. Let's just say I'm positive that I passed.

Second period, CP Civics & Economics, we also had a test. We reviewed for 75% of class time though. The last 15% was actual test time. I'm making a 95 in there currently.

Third period, Theatre Arts II, we read and watched some more of "The Miracle Worker" and then played a game called Big Booty. Hahaha, it was pretty fun, but it was really hard.

Fourth period, Journalism/Yearbook, I charged my phone and made a Player/Coach Questionnaire for the JV football team. That was about it.

After school I went to Akito's. YUMMY!

Now I'm here, and I still haven't finished my drama project, so I need to go.

Write more tomorrow, or, as soon as I can.

XOXO, Emily Love

I miss Cornerstone, badly.

I'm printing off pictures from Cornerstone '08 for my Theatre Arts II project, and it's really making me want to go back there right this very second. I can't wait 'til next year's Cornerstone<3

I'm only at my dad's tonight because I have to use my laptop to print off pictures.

I don't really know what to say. School's going pretty good I guess, but that's boring crap. Oh well, I'm telling about it anyways. I'm making a 95 in CP Civics, and I think I did decent on my Honors Biology test today. Journalism is awesome, because all we do is just chill out in there. We can do pretty much whatever we want, I could even get on and blog. I charged my phone in that class today. Hahaha, it was pretty sweet.

But then again, we do alot of stuff in that class. Like, we have deadlines and assignments, like a real journalist would have. And I still need to sell more ads, I only have ten more days before that deadline. Better get on that...

I miss Alora! She's in Mississippi right now, and I hope she's having an amazing time. I'm praying for her and her aunt right now, who has cancer. I wish her the best because that's what she deserves, and I love her so much, I don't want her to go through the hurt of losing someone....

I'll blog more later.
As soon as I come up with some nifty stuff to say.
;D

XOXO, Emily Love

On the outside looking in...

It's a Saturday afternoon, 1:26 PM. And where am I? At home, sitting here, depressed.

Long story.

More later.


"You don't know how it feels, to be outside the crowd. You don't know what it's like to be left out. And you don't know how it feels to be your own best friend; on the outside looking in. If you could read my mind, you might see more of me than meets the eye. And you've been all wrong, not who you think I am. You've never given me a chance. You don't know how it feels to be outside the crowd. You don't know what it's like to be left out. And you don't know how it feels to be your own best friend; on the outside looking in. I'm tired of staying at home, I'm bored and all alone. I'm sick of wasting all my time. You don't know how it feels, to be outside the crowd. You don't know what it's like to be left out. And you don't know it feels to be your own best friend; on the outside looking in."

The sun always promises a new day.

Yes, it's true. The sun does always promise a new day. Thus the meaning of my middle name: Dawn.

I'm completely worn out, exhausted to the core. Seriously. I'm not going to say much, because:

1) I have a lot on my mind and I'm confused.
2) I'm super tired.

Tonight I felt lame, because it was a Friday night and I didn't get to go to Allen's party and my best friend was with another friend of mine. But whatever, it's all good. My daddy took me & my brothers to Olive Garden, aka my favorite restaurant EVER! It was delicious, and I definitely brought some home.

Then we went to Blockbuster and rented some movies, because we were going to go see a movie but we missed it because the wait for Olive Garden was pretty long. Like 45 minutes or something. Anyways, at Blockbuster, I saw this reallllllly hot guy from my school. And he said hey to me!!!

I was excited.
It pretty much made my day, considering the majority of my day SUCKED.

Oh well, like I said, the sun always promises a new day.

I'll write more tomorrow.

XOXO, Emily Love

P.S.- I freaking love Alora Danin Mize, better known to me as Rae. She's one of the best things that's ever happened to me. She's always there for me, and I just wanted to let everyone know how much I adore her. I'm finding out who my true and best friends are, and the one I am totally sure of is her. Thanks for being there for me when I need you, I love you Rae (:

4th period!

That's where I am right now, sitting in fourth period. I'm supposed to be working on a design layout for a page in the yearbook, but I already finished mine. I really like this class. There's only nine of us, so we all just chill out in here and run errands and stuff. Right now we're all just kind of doing our own thing, and we're deciding on the design of our t-shirts for yearbook staff, and telling Mrs. Slaughter what size we want. I got a Youth L, because I want mine to be kind of tightish....

Haha, anyways, I better get off here before Mrs. Slaughter comes over here and scolds me, hahaha. I don't think she really cares that much...

It's 2:21 (PM) and the bell rings to get out of school at 3:05. So there's about 40 or so minutes left, I think?

Anyways, I'll write more later.

XOXO, Emily Love

"Emily, paint me softly

'cause I wanna' see, a better side of me"....; you should check out that song. It's called 'Emily' by Winn Galloway. Amazing doesn't even begin to describe it. And no, not because it's title is my name.

Anyways, I haven't written in a long time. Sorry for anyone that actually cares, haha. A few things have happened since I last wrote, not tootoo much though.

Well, school started. YAY!? Haha. It's going pretty good actually, until tonight struck me with it's unpreventable disaster. Well, I guess it was preventable, I don't know. Friendship problems. But I honestly am sick of talking about it, we'll see what happens and save that for another night.

Let's see... what else is new? Oh, Marlee has a boyfriend named Bryant now. He's pretty chill.

Well, tonight my dad got me new headphones for my iPod, which I needed BADLY. Considering one of mine didn't even work and they were plastic. Haha, so I was pretty excited about that. I use them on the bus everyday, because I love just chilling out and looking out the windows while I'm listening to music on the bus. It's pretty stress-relieving, I've come to find out.

OH MY GOSH! MARLEE JUST TEXTED ME AND TOLD ME HER DAD SAID ME AND HER CAN'T GET TOGETHER AT ALL FOR THE REST OF THE MONTH!

I. Am. Freaking. Out. Seriously.

I'll write later.
I'm in shock right now.

XOXO, Emily Love